It's okay, we can't all be normal.

There's these things on Facebook these days about God and schools and prisons and other dumb shit like that. I suppose they've been around for a while but I've finally seen enough to write a snarky post about it. See Exhibit A:

My mouth is gaping. I can't think of anything to say. I'm rarely speechless. Just see Exhibit B:

No. That is not the
definition of irony.

I guess my problem with Exhibit A starts with the obvious - the whole separation of church and state thing. But let's move past that dumb law and talk about what really matters: God allowing violence in schools and blaming a lack of corporate religion in secular institutions on God's inability to stop it. Wait, let's just say His, as in His inability to stop it. Because God is a man, right, as indicated by the masculine font chosen for His signature. Perhaps, though, it is that God is not unable but simply unwilling to stop the violence. Or maybe God is neither unable nor unwilling, but rather is unaware that there is violence going on; however, Exhibit A suggests God knows it's happening and is not getting involved because some moronic human decided homeroom was going to be for studying and not praying. Yes, let's blame secularism for violence because Christians have never done anything violent ever. And I'm assuming we're talking about Christians here and not Muslisms or Jews (who also have a God) because only evangelical Christians would say Columbine happened because we all didn't pray enough. That's just bullshit. Kids are bullied and beaten and teased and humiliated because people of all ages really suck ass sometimes and often make decisions that harm other people. And they still would, with or without saying The Lord's Prayer before 2nd period.

Exhibit B. I've already noted that trivial law about separation of church and state and have indicated that perhaps the picture employs an incorrect use of the term irony. Though I must first note that the shackled Bible on the left is pretty funny. I actually didn't see it at first, but I think that's why the little boy is sad. Poor kid can't get to his rock hammer. Anyhow, back to irony. Irony refers to - hell, let's just google it. The third definition on Merriam Webster's website says that irony is the "incongruity between the actual result of a sequence of events and the normal or expected result." Is the situation ironic in that you would expect a prison to not allow Bibles? Where else should a Bible to go but a dark place where there is no Light?? That's exactly where evangelicals should want the Bible to go! Hell, we should ship all Bibles from our churches to the prisons! I mean, Jesus is all about ransoming captives, right? And let's talk about little Timmy, who is so sad with his head in his hands. It's just so hard to go 8 hours without reading your Bible, what with all the time you spend at church and in your daily quiet time. And it is really hard to pray and think about Scripture (that you already should have memorized or you failed youth group) when you can't even think words inside your head without someone interrupting to say, "stop! Don't think that!" Wait...I think that was just a George Orwell novel. So is that the irony? That Timmy wants to read his Bible in school with all his friends during PE and can't because he has to run laps to avoid childhood obesity? Timmy, read your Bible during your school sponsored Christian club time. Perhaps, though, the author of the picture is simply trying to imply that he or she feels it is unexpected that the government allows (encourages even!) Bibles for big boys in prisons but not for little boys in schools.

But that would be myopic.