Retorts: chocolate cakes you can eat again?

I stopped to put gas in Tigerlilly the other day on my way to work. As I was putting the gas hose thing back in the gas hose holder thing, this nearby voice says "hey gorgeous" in a slimy tone that any girl knows means one thing: a leering male construction worker (or any other no talent ass clown of that genre). Sure enough, it was a lawn maintenance worker and his lawn maintenance worker friends. Chimp fucking little bastards. Who the hell do they think they are? Did I invite them into my morning? Hell no. I felt sick like I'd been punched in the soul, and as I fought the rising hysteria, I gave them the most withering glare I could muster. In that second, I couldn't decide on a good enough retort. Do I say nothing and not dignify their behavior with a response? Do I throw something at them - like a rock or a hand grenade - or spray them with something, like 20-foot wasp spray (or in the gas station situation, regular unleaded)? While I did consider throwing rocks at them (even though there were no rocks at hand), I think I've decided to try a disdainful eyebrow raise with a haughty "as if" as I literally look down my nose at them. I mean, it worked in Clueless.

Eww. As if.

One of the first blogs I ever wrote was back in 2008 and it was called Honk if You're an Idiot. I wrote about the dumb things men have yelled at me while I was running and how it made me feel. I think I may have even mentioned throwing rocks. At the time I was still operating in terms of polite lady-like behavior and I'm not sure I would have thought I could respond with anything more than a disgusted head shake. Now, thinking in terms of protecting my acre, I feel a little less considerate of their feelings and little more considerate of mine. In terms of my acre, they might just get a royal "get the fuck off the lawn."