One Vacation Wanted: nice beach, good weather, no cell service.

So I recently posted about not wanting to do my job at some point during the day. I think I might need a real vacation, though, because I've been having the following conversations to myself a lot lately. (In my head the language is really bad, but in order to not seem like the meanest casserole out there, I edited the curse words like they do for R-rated movies played on television).



Kind of how I feel when
the phone rings...

Phone's ringing. I turn off the ringer.
In my head: Muck off.

Out loud, listening to patient voicemails: Umm no, figure it out yourself.
In my head: Muck no.

Provider note on patient letter: Please expedite.
In my head: I'm not going to mucking expedite anything you cupid snitch.

Internal database message received: Please call XYZ back re. reimbursement.
My voicemail message to XYZ: Wamp wamp and here's the check information from when it was cashed over a year ago.
In my head: Mucking idiots. We only mucking reimburse once, you numb mucks. Get your slam system in order.

Patient voicemail: I sent in my payment already, when will it be processed, blah blah.
In my head: I'll get to your slam payment when I mucking get to it, you numb muck. I have two goshslam weeks. Read the mucking letter I sent you.

Receptionist beep-beeps me: Anna, there's a provider on the phone who says she didn't get the approval letter for so-and-so.
My response: I'll send it again.
Note in the database: Sending approval AGAIN.
In my head: cupid mucking idiot. Check your slam email, you numb snitch, or give me a better way to contact you.

Patient phone call: I didn't know there was a copayment. I can't afford a copayment.
Me: I understand. It states there is a copay on the front page of the application. Unfortunately, the copay is as low as we can go. There's no way to wave it. You have up to 6 months from the time of your hearing test to pay for your aids. After that you'll need to get a new test. You'll be able to save up during that time. 

Oh yeah, in case you were wondering.
But this is a great picture for how
I feel when someone asks me
a stupid, er, cupid question.

In my head: Try to be compassionate. You were poor once. You are still poor. Oh here it comes...Don't MUCKING complain you numb bass snitch. Everyone's on a goshslam fixed income, whathemuck you think I make?? And read the mucking app you signed!!!!

And it goes on. You can see how this could be a problem.

I think the technical term is compassion fatigue, but colloquially I like to call it, "my patience has run out for dealing with numb cupid idiots who can't mucking read a letter or think for their goshslam selves." Plus, the Google images for compassion fatigue were lame.

Yes, perhaps a few days away from this place would be nice.

More Recent Life in Pictures

Here are some of the things that have been:

Caren and me at the Night of Spectacles,
the big fundraising gala for mi trabajo

SLiz and me at NOS 

I made food! Garlic mashed cauliflower with
soy chicken and sundried tomatoes. 

This is while I was sewing with Sarah at their house. 

She turned one! Sweet little family of girls.
I definitely want 3 girls now.

I had a GIANT rock-solid sore left neck lymph node.
This is amoxycillin, the only antibio that doesn't make me puke. 

Nora found this at the dog park on Mother's Day and brought it to me.
She's so thoughtful. 

Hanging out with the fam on Mother's Day! 

At least WWF has grammatical standards. 

The caption reads, "To live in the hearts we leave is not to die."
I thought that was beautiful.
And yeah, there's a cemetery next to my office.  

Nora came to work with me after a vet appointment.
Best. Thursday. Ever.

Nonprofit Women Do It On A Budget

Tee hee hee. I just made myself laugh.

Anyhow, at the risk of giving away the best kept secret in Chamblee, there is an awesome thrift store just down the road from my office. It should be called an upscale consignment store because most of the things I buy still have tags on them or were worn maybe once, and upscale because the clothes there are from Banana Republic, White House/Black Market, Ann Taylor, Marc Jacobs, Michael Kors, Theory, and dozens of other brands I've never heard of and can't pronounce.

Last week, everything was 50% off. Everything. Everything.

I am not a fashion blogger - just like I'm not a food blogger - but I do wear clothes. And I like doing that way more than I like making food. So here is some of what I've gotten from this gem of a store:

Cute skirts like these...

And more fun skirts like these 

Blazers for work AND play.

These awesome blue cropped pants.
I have no idea what the fabric is, but
I love it.

Awesome dresses like these.
Don't judge the un-ironed green one.

Comfy tops and sweaters. The 2nd one in is by
Marc Jacobs. Who in real life really owns Marc Jacobs???
Probably that sweet love on the left :)

This is how I stay in clothes. Macklemore had it right - $50 for a t-shirt? Maybe if it made me dinner and washed itself.

Ha ha ha, ho ho ho, and a couple of tra la la laaas

There comes a point every day when I don't want to do my job anymore. I want to color or go to the gym or just go home and not take care of whiney adults all day or process the same dumb paperwork. I want to work with colorful abstraction and not concrete black and white. Luckily, that point usually comes sometime after I've gotten to work so I've at least gotten a little bit of the black and white stuff taken care of.

(That's just a side note because I'm writing this while incredibly bored at my desk. I want to sew or do something else creative but alas I am stuck in my office and it's a straight paperwork day, hence my quick break to freestyle write about what else is on my mind).

I find fewer things immoral than, say, your average church. I know that. It's probably because I don't really go to church all that much and, since seminary, less things fall into black and white do/don't categories. But one thing I find incredibly immoral - and unethical and just plain wrong - is retail markups. I get the point of making a profit: sure, add a little on so you can stay in business and I have the convenience of buying from you instead of owning and milking my own cow. Just don't increase the price 300-500%.

Seriously.

(Another side note: I am incredibly grateful and indebted to the hearing aid manufacturers - HAMs - and providers who work with my organization. Yay.)

But just suppose the following scenario: we buy hearing aids at, say, $215 per aid. Just throwing a number out there. That is well below the sale price the HAMs gives to regular retailers (we essentially get the manufacturing price). Just say the regular retailers have to buy those same aids at around $550 per aid. You will pay approximately $2000 per aid when you walk into your hearing doctor's office. Hopefully everyone involved can stay in business with those kinds of margins. It would be really sad to see someone have to live on less than that.

Oh wait.

19 Months

Just like any proud mother, I've been noting the growth of my sweet girl. She is just over 19 months old but since she is a dog, I just say that she's a year and a half or almost 2. I should start saying her age in months, though, now that I think about it. Especially at the dog park. That would win us some awkward stares.

Also like any mother, I can see what traits she gets from me. We have several things in common:
1. We both have a strong attachment to my bed. Our bed. The bed.

2. Snuggling is our #1 favorite thing.
3. Sometimes we're not so hungry so we don't eat a lot, and then sometimes we're so hungry we eat everything in sight.
4. Rough-housing with our friends is a favorite pastime (though much more appropriate for her than for me. That's why I go to jiujitsu).
5. We like to be outside and roll in the grass. Again, probably more acceptable for her to roll in the grass but I definitely understand the desire.
6. We're both pretty curious, but can be extremely cautious and hesitant when trying new things. We like to have someone we trust with us when, say, we see a vacuum cleaner across the parking lot and want to sniff it but aren't sure what it is.
7. Naps.
8. Neither of us has ever met a stranger, but some people are just straight creepy.
9. We are both incredibly clumsy. It's kind of cute on her, though.
10. Shoes. I like to wear them and she likes to chew them. She gets that from her father, though (the rat bastard).

"In this country, we bury people"

So there's this issue about burying the body of one of the Boston Marathon bombers, and I think it's sad. I think it's very sad. I know I'm a little overly sensitive to justice issues, but this just makes me sad. No matter what he's done, he is still a person. And all people - yes, Hitler and Mussolini and all those terrible people - are still people. I'm not saying he needs a state funeral, but bury him and leave him be. Hating him isn't going to make you feel better.

Update 5/9/13. Thank God.