Kitchen Reno, Pre-Start: Ugly is over. Go to Lowe's.

Since my financial goals do not include a new and updated apartment, and since my HGTV addiction makes me want to DIY the hell out of everything on less than $15, I decided to do a little something extra to my not-so-fancy-schmancy mid-1990's apartment. I made a list of things I wanted to improve and started with the most obvious: the cabinetry. Who doesn't love dirty, greasy, nasty, scuffed up cabinetry in a light, faux-oak stain? Oh right. This girl.

So I Pinterest-ed "how to stain my kitchen cabinets" and read 2 tutorials and looked at the pictures. I figured this made me an expert, so I took the best from both (i.e., pieced together ways to make it as easy as possible) and went to Lowe's. Since I am writing this in hindsight, I will explain it like I'm 5. Because that's how I wish the tutorial people had explained it to me.

First, when you go to Lowe's, here is what you'll need to get:

• Gloves. I bought nitrile resistant, or nitrile proof, or maybe just nitrile gloves. They are green and size medium (because there were no smalls). I bought 2 pairs for $4 each.
• Lots of plastic sheeting. I bought 3 rolls of 12 foot stuff for about $2 each. There's never enough covering of delicate things like stoves and floors, and your desk (which is where you will be putting the cabinet doors to dry since it's raining outside).
• Stain. I bought 2 quarts of Dark Walnut: Penetrate, Stain, and Seal (that sounds really dirty) by Minwax for about $8 each. I could have looked on the can to see how much area it says it covered, and probably discovered that one can was enough. But I didn't.
• A paint stir stick. I still haven't figured out if you have to stir the stain, but I got one anyway. It was free. I hope. Otherwise I just shoplifted for the first time in my life and I didn't even mean to and I didn't even get anything cool.
• A paint/stain can opener. Probably the best idea I've had so far. It was less than $1. I should have just gotten a lot of those.
• Foam brushes. I bought the biggest ones they had figuring it would be best to cover the most surface area, right? Wrong. I'm glad I also bought smaller sizes because the biggest size doesn't fit in the can opening. They were about $1 each and I got 6 (you never know).
• A sanding block. I borrowed a friend's power sander and will probably use it for the rest of the project. I saw the sanding block in one of the tutorials and thought, hey, that looks easier. But I'm not sure if it's working really well, so... $4.
• Painter's tape. To tape down the plastic sheeting that will be covering your entire existence for the next week or so. I had some at home so this was free. Boom. Saving money right and left.

When you get home, grab as many old t-shirts as you can find. I seriously don't know why I need them, but I've found at least three reasons to have them. Then clear a place on your porch, but not too big of a space because you'll be moving everything inside once you realize how humid and rainy it's going to be for the next few days. It's also a lot cooler inside and everything is less sticky. Except your cabinets. Because you did that part wrong...which leads to Day 1: The First Stain is the Deepest. And Won't Dry.

Also, I added a final picture frame and put an old map of the home town (34952). Now I'm just waiting to find the perfect oval/round mirror, and voila!

The wall-o-family

Speaking of family, this perfection happened:

Lila looks just like her mommy